full time single father, part time internet addiction.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

"Looking forward to the memories of right now.'

The other day I had a discussion with my parents. I think it started because I mentioned to them that I was taking the fall semester off from school. I mentioned to them that I will have to start paying back my student loans. In a generalized way, we discussed mine and Atticus' current lives right now.

Society views someone at my age as a failure who is living with his parents. I asked my parents if they agreed. If I should quit my 28- hour a week job, start looking for full time decent work and try and get out of there and be on my own.

I am happy with my life right now. I only work very part time, yet since I don't have that many bills I am still able to afford to pay the bills, to have extra spending money, and to build a savings in my name, Atticus' name, and a college savings in his name all at different banks and be able to add to them a few times a month.

I fought to have Atticus full time. I fought for this not to put him in a day care or leave him with someone else and go leave to work. I fought to have him, to be with him. At this point in my life, I am capable of doing so much stuff with him. On a weekly basis we are constantly going out on outings, to places like the water park, bike rides, go out for treats, the zoo, play areas and parks, and various other random things. We are going to visit both his friends and mine, we are able to do so much, all because I live at home and do not a have a rent/morgage bill to pay or the other bills that come with renting or home ownership, and since I don't have to pay something like that I don't have to work as much, so in-turn, I am able to focus my time with Atticus. He is never at a daycare, he is constantly with someone he loves that loves him.

Sure I have to live at home. But other than saying that and having people 'think less of me' because of that, that is really the only down fall I see in it. I know in the back of my mind that Atticus and I will eventually have to provide entirely for ourselves and we will not have all this time together because I will have to work a real full-time job, but that is down the road. Tomorrow is never promised so I live for today.

I am so happy in my life right now and I can see that Atticus is for his too. I work very few hours, I hardly ever have to wake up to an alarm clock, I have wonderful friends, cute girls, a fast car, have time to myself for my social life, my hobbies, have a stylish little son, who is smart, friendly, cute. Already potty trained! A loving family, so much time to do new things with my son, to cook us good food, to relax and play out back with my little man. I don't mean to brag or sound cocky, I am just verbalizing my gratitude for the things I have in my life because at any moment it can all fall down.

So after talking to my parents they in no way look down on me, they do not think I am any sort of failure, and they agree with my choices in life. They SEE the time I spend with Atticus and the time I focus on him. The look forward to knowing everyday they will see their little bundle of joy grandson, and in no way are annoyed by having him around, it is something that some grandparents would give anything for. With that comes the closeness and strength of a family. Not only does he have immediate family to go to for help, ideas, or support, he will also have his Grandparents there who he will obviously be very close with.

Life is about being happy. I am happy, Atticus is happy. We have the common needs any human has fulfilled. We enjoy life, that is most important, not what other people think.

On a different note, I went for a 48 mile bike ride yesterday as I had the day off and Atticus is at his moms for the weekend. Such a beautiful ride. Country roads, barns, downtown Nampa, highway, the Greenbelt, downtown Boise, then city streets. I got a good mix of everything. I really enjoyed it.

Been staying busy doing Dedicated Server stuff and just having fun with friends. Exciting stuff coming up this week! As for today, I think Atticus and I are off to get sno-cones with Owen for his birthday.

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